The Nonsense / Chat / Fast Answer / Guest Thread

Post #1 made 8 years ago
Guests* and members, please feel free to use this thread for general chatting, asking and answering quick questions or when you feel as though you might be just writing utter nonsense :D

[ADMIN NOTE: Edited on 20th March 2015 to expand the range of this topic.

*Guests and Visitors, it may take a few days from the time of writing the admin note above to get this thread working for you as well.
Last edited by BIABrewer on 14 Feb 2010, 06:05, edited 41 times in total.

Post #2 made 7 years ago
I had a bloke over for a drink some time ago and he gave me the most ridiculous statement I've heard for some time. He was drinking Toohey's Extra Dry(?) this should have been a give away.
I offered him a pint of Schwartzbier, which he accepted. Followed by the comment;

"It's nice beer, but the problem with home brew is that it doesn't taste like beer you can buy."

PHILISTINE! That's the whole point of home brewing, if I wanted to drink tasteless crap, I could buy it for $50 a carton!
"It's beer Jim, but not as we know it."

Post #3 made 7 years ago
hashie wrote:I had a bloke over for a drink some time ago and he gave me the most ridiculous statement I've heard for some time. He was drinking Toohey's Extra Dry(?) this should have been a give away.
I offered him a pint of Schwartzbier, which he accepted. Followed by the comment;

"It's nice beer, but the problem with home brew is that it doesn't taste like beer you can buy."

PHILISTINE! That's the whole point of home brewing, if I wanted to drink tasteless crap, I could buy it for $50 a carton!
This is exactly why I am very selective to whom I give my beer to.
Last edited by outbreak on 01 Oct 2010, 14:42, edited 41 times in total.

Post #4 made 7 years ago
Good on you hashie for activating the nonsense thread - I think it is meant to be BIABrewer's version of a live chat thread where we can all talk garbage and/or seriously but, if we do write some absolute garbage, it will magically disappear the next day - cool!!! I was too scared to post here before so you are the man!

Good on you too for replying outbreak! So...

Toohey Extra Dry - WTF? (This is an appallingly brewed Australian beer. If you are over 30 you will get an instant headache. If you're over 35 and drinking this you can't possibly be a binge drinker, can you? If you're over 50 and still have this in your fridge, ring the Guinness Book of Records, put heaps of them in your fridge and you might win a world record for how many disgusting beers you can fit in one fridge! If you have no access to TED then I can name a heap of alternatives :).

But, I take the piss to some degree. I have drunk heaps of beers like TED in my younger days and enjoyed them. Back then though, there was no choice. It is the chemical additives that often make me criticise these beers as well as their lack of depth and dimension.

But, we home brewers have a tendency to quickly accelerate towards more flavour. In some areas of brewing, us brewers remind me of my days making spaghetti bollanaise when I was at agricultural college. The more herbs and red wine etc, etc, you threw in the better!!! (I doubt I would enjoy the richness now but it was bloody lovely at the time!)

I must say I enjoy tasty beers but, to be honest, the best beer I have had in my life was a very subtle but fascinating lager. New brewers often ask for help in how to brew a lager style beer and are often ignored. Great to see that there are now two recipes on this site that will give these guys something that will satisfy those who want a Becks, Heineken, Pilsner Urquell, Budwar etc - quaffing type beers for the young ;) but recipes that can be exquisite for the old ;).

That's my thoughts for now - I write way too much!
:)
PP

P.S. hashie, how old was this bloke criticising your Schwartz or more importantly, what type of personality? Schwartz is a beer that nearly every age group would say, "Yum!" regardless of its colour.
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Post #5 made 7 years ago
Last weekend I brewed my choco beer, and during the process drank a lot of my wheat that I had in the fridge. Consequently, when me and my wife went to dinner that night and ordered sushi I wanted wine instead of their crappy beer selection. My wife, however, was of a different mind after just getting off a long work day and ordered a beer. Some guys at a table near us then began to snicker when they say beer brought out to my wife and wine for me. The snickering idiots were drinking bud light. It was hard to resist the urge to walk over and offer to refill their glasses by pissing in them. I'm pretty sure my piss had more flavor (and probably alcohol) than their prescious bud light that advertising has taught them to think of as beer.
Arrogant Bastard Ale: "...Perhaps you think multi-million dollar ad campaigns make a beer taste better. Perhaps you're mouthing your words as you read this."

Post #6 made 7 years ago
Love that story sacsoul, I always think the same when people drink Coronas. The same bloke that didn't like my Schwartzbier asked if I could make a corona clone, I answered "well first I would have to piss in the fermenter..." This went straight over his head, I wonder why?

Pat, he is in his late 40's and is ex-army, obviously has his taste buds in his arse.
"It's beer Jim, but not as we know it."

Post #7 made 7 years ago
While away camping noticed that there was a small rip in the floor of the tent.
So when we got home i went and bought a tent repair kit from the local camping store.
When I got home I got out the instructions and started to read. :interesting:
Went like this.
1. Clearance filth, the both sides draws the glue, needing the glue and does not gluing hard houring can immediately glue to match, empress of 12 hour can use. :interesting:
2. Unscrew threaded cap, Carefully pierce seal at the end of metal tube with reverse end of cap, and than replace plastic nozzle. (have another beer :drink: )
3. Store the gule :shock: at cool, avoid the fire, and seal completly the term bottom can use, deposit over a long period time. :scratch: (think about stop drinking)( grab another beer :drink: )
4. The both sides draws the empress, and heat the empress to glue again to connect.
Clear as mud :headhit: :sneak:
Needless to say there is still a hole in the floor of the tent. :interesting:

Mex

Post #8 made 7 years ago
:lol: sounds like another google translate moment :lol:
"All right, brain. You don't like me and I don't like you, but let's just do this and I can get back to killing you with beer."
[/i] Homer Simpson K.I.S.S., B.I.A.B.[/b]

Post #9 made 7 years ago
Haha, that is funny!! You need to do a google translation on the google translation... :think:
Arrogant Bastard Ale: "...Perhaps you think multi-million dollar ad campaigns make a beer taste better. Perhaps you're mouthing your words as you read this."

Post #11 made 7 years ago
Mex wrote:While away camping noticed that there was a small rip in the floor of the tent.
So when we got home i went and bought a tent repair kit from the local camping store.
When I got home I got out the instructions and started to read. :interesting:
Went like this.
1. Clearance filth, the both sides draws the glue, needing the glue and does not gluing hard houring can immediately glue to match, empress of 12 hour can use. :interesting:
2. Unscrew threaded cap, Carefully pierce seal at the end of metal tube with reverse end of cap, and than replace plastic nozzle. (have another beer :drink: )
3. Store the gule :shock: at cool, avoid the fire, and seal completly the term bottom can use, deposit over a long period time. :scratch: (think about stop drinking)( grab another beer :drink: )
4. The both sides draws the empress, and heat the empress to glue again to connect.
Clear as mud :headhit: :sneak:
Needless to say there is still a hole in the floor of the tent. :interesting:

Mex

"no touch here, as hot!"

was in the instructions for a scooter i had that pointed at the exhaust pipe in such eloquent Chinese-computer-speaks-English.

hashie wrote:I had a bloke over for a drink some time ago and he gave me the most ridiculous statement I've heard for some time. He was drinking Toohey's Extra Dry(?) this should have been a give away.
I offered him a pint of Schwartzbier, which he accepted. Followed by the comment;

"It's nice beer, but the problem with home brew is that it doesn't taste like beer you can buy."

PHILISTINE! That's the whole point of home brewing, if I wanted to drink tasteless crap, I could buy it for $50 a carton!

CLASSIC! the only reason i find to make something that is as close as possible to whatever it is that you can buy ie... beer, pants, dinner; would be to make it better quality, cheaper, and pride of "I MADE THIS!!"
Last edited by mordantly on 25 Aug 2011, 07:25, edited 41 times in total.
MoRdAnTlY [Mr. Wolf '91 - '11]

Post #12 made 6 years ago
The Philistine mentality.
One of the reasons I make furniture only for me!
I don't mind sharing my beer though. :cool:
Regards; OB wan c'nardly :)
I started with nothing; I still have most of it left.

Nonsense about attire, kettles and pots

Post #13 made 5 years ago
[MODNOTE: This post originated from this thread :)]
BIABrewer.info is primarily an information site. Whilst the thread creator obviously has a lot of weight, when a thread goes off-topic or becomes totally non-brew-related, we all know that we are not servicing the user who is trying to gain information.

Going off-topic is fun, as is general banter. To retain the fun as well as the integrity of the site, when appropriate, active posters here should direct traffic to The Nonsense (Chat) Thread.

GR, I am hoping you will kick that thread off again.

No more off-topic posts here please! Nuff said (again) :)
Nuff....You're on to me! :) You win! :)

In all seriousness,

Where I'm from 1 hour South of the Coat Hanger (that famous bridge in Sydney) it gets pretty fresh (cold) in Winter. Not to many Aussies wearing long johns though. To avoid the heat most Aussie sheilas (that's a girl) would probably be chucking on a wife beater (a blue singlet) pair of double pluggers (pair of thongs) and some ruggers (shorts).

Hope that answered your question, I've got to go chase a couple of Kangaroos out of the yard, they're eating my gum trees.

Aussie Aussie Aussie...Oi Oi Oi.
That's so Funny BrewMitta :champ:

....So that's ok then! Any pictures? maybe you guys with your partners in the sweltering heat.

I thought you Aussies would have no strides on when it got too hot. The first thing we'd do if we go there is strip off completely (watch out!) these balaclavas, scarves, hats, long johns, insulated leggings and boots, and heavy coats are getting so tedious!

What do people drink their beer from? mugs, steins, pint pots, flagons, yards...maybe that's what kettles are for!
Last edited by GuingesRock on 08 Jan 2013, 22:41, edited 41 times in total.
Guinges

Post #14 made 5 years ago
Cans, stubbies or glasses. 'Bogans' drink from cans and 'yuppies' from glasses :P. Here's a little bit more Australiana for you...

Austen Tayshus

(Not sure how much will be understood internationally :scratch:)
Last edited by PistolPatch on 09 Jan 2013, 00:43, edited 41 times in total.
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Post #16 made 5 years ago
It looks like an awful lot of fun!

I’m learning the lingo from Joshua’s post. Wife’s getting some wife beaters.

I might be somewhere between a Yuppie and a Bogan. I’ll have to make a move one way or the other, otherwise I’ll be very confused at the bar. Actually I can handle that…done it before.

I’m getting after those kangaroos! especially if they eat my gum trees.
Guinges

Post #17 made 5 years ago
GuingesRock wrote:It looks like an awful lot of fun!

I’m learning the lingo from Joshua’s post. Wife’s getting some wife beaters.

I might be somewhere between a Yuppie and a Bogan. I’ll have to make a move one way or the other, otherwise I’ll be very confused at the bar. Actually I can handle that…done it before.

I’m getting after those kangaroos! especially if they eat my gum trees.
Good on ya' mate. Your picking it up, swell. Your nearly talking like an old bushie.

We do say those words in Aus, but not one after the other in every sentence like I've made out. You probably all realise this though.

What other misconceptions do people have of Aus ??? I once had a bloke telling me he thought there would be kangaroos jumping around the middle of Sydney!!!! I quickly set him right and told him that was a myth. There are far to many crocodiles in Sydney for kangaroos.
Last edited by BrewMitta on 09 Jan 2013, 06:40, edited 41 times in total.

Post #18 made 5 years ago
G'ood Day, I heard the King Browns took out the Croc's.....or was that Football(soccer)????
Honest Officer, I swear to Drunk, I am Not God.
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Post #19 made 5 years ago
MODNOTE: Moved this and subsequent posts from Black Gold - How can I brew the perfect Guinness? to make it easier for you guys to chat. Cheers Nuff.

I'll help! I'm coming back to the UK in the next month or two to see my mum. Would you bring some down to Cornwall? (Mevagissey)

(Guinges Rock is a small island in the Atlantic about a mile out from Mevagissey, made of rock and seagull s...t. I used to sail around it when I was a kid) :)
Last edited by GuingesRock on 11 Jan 2013, 07:11, edited 41 times in total.
Guinges

Post #20 made 5 years ago
GuingesRock wrote:I'll help! I'm coming back to the UK in the next month or two to see my mum. Would you bring some down to Cornwall? (Mevagissey)
Sorry pal, no can do, we all know that Guinness doesn't travel well. :lol: :lol:

Mevagissey :argh: :argh: I new a girl from Mevagissey..no bull, we met one new years eve when I was on a Minesweeper back in the 80's (85 or 86) her dad had a restaurant on the quayside. Fantastic place :thumbs:
Last edited by Yeasty on 11 Jan 2013, 07:18, edited 40 times in total.
Why is everyone talking about "Cheese"
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Post #21 made 5 years ago
:lol: Bet I know her. Was she a Robins from "The Bistro"? ...don't have to say, and I won't say anything either. Just bring the Guinness and do as you're told :)

...Minesweeper eh! I bet you knew Charles from Chapel Point. Prince Charles dropped in once to play croquet with him I believe, in his helicopter. And of course to have some guinness. Just to stay on topic here :)
Guinges

Post #23 made 5 years ago
I know....He's CRAZY :argh: ...... But he did drink Guinness on the croquet lawn. The moderators are sleeping soundly down there. There'll be trouble in the morning :)
Last edited by GuingesRock on 11 Jan 2013, 07:51, edited 1 time in total.
Guinges

Post #24 made 5 years ago
GuingesRock wrote::lol: Bet I know her. Was she a Robins from "the Bistro"? ...don't have to say, and I won't say anything either. Just bring the Guinness and do as you're told :)
You probably will,,To be honest I can't remember the name,her dad had an old shape Rover (ex police car) and they lived on the road going out of town up the hill. she had lovely long hair all the way down her back, non on her head, just down her back.. :lol: No seriously she did have long hair, I met up with her once for a drink when she was at Middleborough Uni and she had a skin head :shock: :o .

Might just have to bring you some Guinness after all. :lol:
Last edited by Yeasty on 11 Jan 2013, 07:43, edited 40 times in total.
Why is everyone talking about "Cheese"
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